[pause for applause]
Last year, my company's IT department blocked all computer access to any type of blog. Since I did the majority of my blog writing while at work, I had to stop. Work consumed my life and soul until I had no energy to blog let alone paint let alone think about painting.
And then I was no longer working, and this made me greatly happy in ways that you would understand. It also made me greatly unhappy in other ways that you may not understand. People keep telling me that I can now focus on toys full time and spend all of my time painting. That sounds wonderful, but only in the abstract.
I paint because I love to paint. As soon as I make it my career, I will need to start to live off of the money I make from painting. Thus, if I don't paint, I don't make money. Sometimes I don't feel like painting. Sometimes I decide to binge watch Penny Dreadful or Breaking Bad. While I am watching episode after episode, I don't want to have that twinge of guilt that keeps my eyes darting back to my painting table every so often. Making money is something we often feel the need to do to be deemed a "success" in today's society. In order to potentially make money, I'd paint. At some time in the nebulous future, I will have to push myself to paint regardless of whether I actually want to in order to continue making money. This will be the tipping point that may ultimately lead to me burning myself out and I'll still have to paint and sell it and it will make me feel like shit. And all of that assumes that everything I paint sells!
[paper bag breathing and one therapeutic nap later]
Where was I? Maybe I'll just be indignant, sarcastic, and witty about anything and everything and become a youtube sensation or trend on Twitter or some shit. If only apathy could motivate people. I don't care about lots of stuff. Together we can agree that we don't care about useless stuff. woo.
And while I'm out on a tangent, I may as well reveal that when someone compares you to Sheldon Cooper on The Big Bang Theory, it may feel like a compliment, but I assure you it is not! You get pegged as eccentric, difficult, and emotionally obtuse. That was strangely specific of me, but I assure you it has nothing to do with recent events in my life >.<
So yeah back on topic, you'll be seeing more of me, but not full-time more. Well, unless I decide to do it full time. And that would be a mistake, future Tori. A MISTAKE!
Speaking of mistakes, my biggest recent mistake was not releasing these custom Choices before Halloween. Lucky you, they're now available at my storenvy store. Dark Choices. They're exactly the bunnies from the dark prophecy! Ooooo spooooky! See? Aw, that would have been so much better if it was BEFORE Halloween. Blergh.
|Buy Dark Choices. Or not. Whatever.|
(Please buy it; I need money)
((SEE THAT FELT LIKE ABSOLUTE SHIT))